Sometimes, I just want to quit trying. I want to tell everyone, if you want to be in my life then prove it. I'm finished with trying to hold something together when the other person doesn't care if it falls apart.
I've been known to put a wall up between myself and others, and this is the exact reason why. They never stick around. What's the point in opening up, or getting close to someone if they're not going to be there in the end?
Maybe that's some crucial lesson in life that I missed out on. The one that tells you that you should open your heart up and set yourself up for disaster.
It's a cruel joke that I'm tired of being the subject of.
If you want me around, don't push me away. The second you start pushing me away, I'm going to put up a barrier that you'll probably never get another chance to get past.
My hearts been kicked around more times than I care to remember, and I just can't take that anymore.
I want to trust people. I want to love beyond all limitations. I want to stop hurting myself. I want others to stop thinking any kind of relationship with me is just a game.
If you don't plan on staying in my life, then get the fuck out.
I'd rather be lonely, than keep holding onto a false hope that anybody actually gives a shit about me.
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